Naked Werewolf Sex

Clay_and_Elena_by_Samloveskilts(image credit: DeviantARt-Samloveskilts)

***STOLEN Spoiler Alert!!***

Armstrong has a way of wading in erotic fantasy without getting dirty. Elena is the badass with a pretty face that we all want to be: a successful, slim bodied journalist that lets off steam running through midnight metropolises. As a werewolf, so without any of the crucial trepidation of her human counterparts. 

In BITTEN she embraces her identity as the only living female werewolf, and the characters in STOLEN exemplify why that’s such an exotic and sought-after existence.

Bauer is now reeling from injecting herself with Elena’s spit, which I probably would TOTALLY do if I had a chance, barring any guaranteed threat to my children. I want to be a werewolf. There you have it.

Ignoring the detailed depiction of Bauer’s agonizing ordeal, I completely get it–having a familial outlet through which to act out all of my repressed wolfiness? Can you imagine?  Assuming we could refrain from eating our neighbors, what a great world this would be if we had a little of that–Changing once a week for a midnight deer hunt/sex romp with our gorgeous anthropologist husbands.

I just love Clay. It makes me realize how much I love Rich. There was a monumental Something missing from my marriage that I have with Rich, and that I never really knew I needed. Ok, this is going to be gross, but I have an example:

My college friend, after having a baby, thought something was wrong with her butthole. She suffered through fourth-degree tearing (which I can tell you from experience is no picnic) and things weren’t feeling quite right down there. She was concerned and wanted to get checked out. Who did she ask to look? HER HUSBAND.

I was appalled. Because at the time I was doing everything to make myself more attractive to a man who was sleeping with everyone in the neighborhood but me. I had lost weight, changed my hair, my likes, my voice, my morals, my parenting…I promise I didn’t realize until later, but that’s what I was doing. I couldn’t imagine why my friend would do that, and how her husband would look at her afterward.

Weird story to bring up, right? But it’s not, because THAT’S TRUE LOVE, as gross and weird as it is. Clay and Elena know each other’s scars, warts, histories and cellulite (if they had any, which they don’t.). Clay continually exhibits total devotion to Elena, and definitely, DEFINITELY, would check out her butthole if something was amiss.

So would Rich. And then he’d try to have sex with me. I mean, that’s love.

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